Finding the Words for Sexy Stuff9/5/2016 It can be hard to find words you’re comfortable using to describe sexual stuff. There are so many weird or uncomfortable connotations that go along with sex-related words. But having a vocabulary you’re more or less comfortable using makes it a lot easier to communicate about sex with your partner(s), and with anyone!
Since better communication tends to mean better sexual experiences, it’s worth a shot! Sunday was the Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health’s (CSPH) Body Positive Clothing Swap. I was there with my my Pleasure Pie merch table, chatting with some awesome sex positive advocates and regularly ditching my table to dig through the massive amounts of clothing. While I was there, I donated a copy of Choose Your Own Consensual Adventure to the CSPH’s extensive sex positive library (flip through it if you’re ever in the Pawtucket area!) and checked out the other zines. There were some awesome sex positive zines that I had never heard of! Here’s a quick review of 4 of my favorites. 4 Awesome Sex Positive Zines1. Talk Dirty. Cleanly. This zine is so good. It talks all about talking dirty, gives many examples, and has fun fill-in-the-blank exercises to get you started. It’s a great way to figure out how to engage in sexy talk that reflects your personality, as opposed to feeling like you sound like a cliche porn star (not that talking like porn performers is bad, I just mean that it’s nice to feel like you sound like you – an ultra sexy you). This zine was put out by ScrewSmart in Philly. 2. How to Disclose Your STI & Feel Good About It This friendly little zine offers some sound, nonjudgmental guidance for telling a partner about your STI(s). It feels way more realistic down to earth than most STI info on the internet. Plus, many of the communication tips are helpful for any conversation. Zine by Ess Elle. 3. Menstrual Cup, A Love Story Sorry to leave you out, penis owners, but this topic is close to my heart. Adelaide makes the discussion of menstrual cups fun and personal by briefly sharing the story of how she started using them after being a long-time tampon user. Next is a breakdown of how to use a menstrual cup, including some helpful tips that you won’t find elsewhere. Also, illustrations! This zine is totally worth reading for anyone who might be interested in trying a menstrual cup, or long time menstrual cup lovers. I’ve been using a menstrual cup for years, and I learned some new tips. Zine by Adelaide Barton of Lady Gardens. 4. Tips for Emerging Sexology Professionals: Networking and Nurturing
This zine is good if you’re trying to make a career out of your interest in sex positivity / sexual health. It offers practical tips for moving up in the field. And when I say practical, I mean practical to the point of possibly uninspiring if your vision of your sex positive career is based more on passion than on success. I recommend reading this zine to get a better understanding of the things you can do to succeed in the sexology field, while keeping in mind that your passion is most important – it’s why you’re doing this in the first place – and altering your path completely to be as hire-able as possible could get in the way of you fulfilling your full potential. Hold on to your passion and run with it! And learn some very useful tips for professional development in this zine. It’s available for free online! Bonus: I heard this (sexy) song for the first time at the clothing swap and have been listening to it nonstop ever since: Whatever You Like (cover) by Anya Marina |