Pelvic pleasure doesn't always come easy. In addition to bodies being complex and sometimes confusing, heteronormative ideas about sex can make it hard to tap into the body's full potential for pleasure.

We talked with Mirah Sand, a pelvic floor specialist based in Boston, about queering pelvic pleasure, as well as surprising pelvic practices that can help maximize pleasure, and what being present during sex really means.

Look, I’m not trying to romanticize this crap. Pain sucks. Sometimes, when it feels like I’ve been jinxed with the ability to pee sulfuric acid, or my clitoris is in no-chill, angry-like-the-Bride-in-Kill-Bill mode, I curse whatever vengeful deity is messing with my genitals.

But as much as I’d love to completely indulge in hyper-cynicism, I have to admit that dealing with pelvic pain has, in some ways, made my life better. And yes, that includes my sex life.