Intro to Boston's BDSM Scene

Are you interested in kink and BDSM and not sure where to start (and living in the Boston area)? Meeting other people who are into BDSM and finding a community can make being kinky a lot more fulfilling. We recommend going to some events in person and finding an online community.

Here are our suggestions for connecting to the BDSM community in the Boston area.

1. Go to a BDSM or other adult sexuality workshop.

This is a great way to learn while also getting a feel for the local kink community.

Check out:

• BLOOD (Boston Leather Organization of Dykes): Free and low-cost social events, workshops, and other programming for leatherdykes
• Bondage N Boston: Educational and artistic experiences with bondage, kink, BDSM, and engaging classes
• Boston Area BIPOC Social: Qinky community organizing for BIPOC in the Boston area
• Boston Rope Collective: Queer and femme-led collective for rope events in Boston
• NE Queer Rope Collective: A collective amplifying queer voices in kink and affirming queer pleasure
• SMart Boston Collab: A welcoming and accessible kink community organized by queer femmes
  

2. Go to a munch.

Munches are meant to be a low-key and welcoming space for kinksters to connect.

Check out:

• Boston Area Age Play Munch: A monthly munch for kinksters who are interested in age play
• Boston Kinky People of Color Munch Group: Munches that aim to be a safer space for folks who have felt left out or tokenized for being the only person of color at kinky, non-monogamous, or other alternative community events
• Boston's The Next Generation (BTNG): Events for kinksters ages 18-35
  

3. Go to a fetish night.

While local kinksters will tell you that Providence is the place for the best BDSM nightlife scene, Boston does have some great fetish nights.

Check out:

• Fantasy Factory: A monthly fetish night at Manray in Cambridge
• Fascination: A monthly kink/fetish night in Boston
• GENDERFUCKERS: A transgender kink night at Jacque’s in Boston
• Nuzzle: A furry dance party at Jacque's in Boston
• Xmortis: A monthly goth/fetish night at the Middle East in Cambridge

4. Attend a kink convention.

Conventions are an exciting way to immerse yourself in kinky community and learning.

Check out:

• Anthro New England: An annual furry convention in Boston
• KinkyCon: An annual BDSM, polyamory, gender identity, alternative sexuality conference in Nashua, NH
  
• Tethered Together: An annual rope bondage convention in nearby-ish Stamford, CT

5. Subscribe to Boston's Sex-Positive Newsletter.

This is a monthly email newsletter by Pleasure Pie lists local sexuality-related events, including BDSM events, as well as queer, trans, sex ed, nonmongamy, sex work, consent, sexual trauma, sexual wellness, feminist, and other related events.

6. Join Fetlife.com if you haven't already.

You can find way more kinky events listed on there.

7. Educate yourself!

Connecting with the local BDSM community is just as much about what you're bringing to the table as it is about what you're looking to get out of it. So make sure that you are familiar with proactive consent and safety practices, open communication, navigating power dynamics and intersectional oppression, etc.

KinkAcademy.com has a fantastic collection of kink and BDSM video tutorials for learning about all things kink. Some videos are free, or you can pay for a monthly subscription to access everything on their site.

Also, the NE Queer Rope Collective put together this great guide to get your kink education journey started: Educational Resources.

8. Get kink affirming support when you need it.

Things happen, and our city has a handful of great organizations that offer support specifically for people with marginalized sexualities.

Check out:

• The Network La Red: An organization that supports kinky, LGBTQ+, and nonmonogamous people who have experienced partner abuse in the Boston area
• Boston Area Friendly Therapy Resources: A guide to finding a Boston-area therapist for kinky folks, queer and trans folks, nonmonogamous folks, and sex workers
  
• Sexual Freedom Legal Defense and Education Fund: A nonprofit that offers legal support to people who engage in kink and BDSM, polyamory, and swinging
  

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​​Good luck, and happy BDSM-ing!